The (manufactured) dangers of the office holiday party

Craig Silverman, December 16, 2008 at 11:04 AM EST [posted this brilliant observation at glodeandmail.com website and confirms my infidelity advice.]

http://business.theglobeandmail.com/servlet/story/RTGAM.20081216.WBtheoffice20081216110423/WBStory/WBtheoffice

Imagine for a moment that this isn't the Year of the Cancelled or Scaled-Back Office Party. Great news, right? Not according to some experts. Granted, embarrassing things happen at the office holiday party: bad dancing, drunken colleagues, make-out sessions etc.

But a couple of experts want you to view the gathering as a breeding ground for sinister behaviour.

Take it away “infidelity expert” Ruth Houston, author of Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs: The annual Christmas party is prime time for a work spouse relationship to make the transition to a workplace affair. Fortified by a few drinks, one work spouse may say or do something to their work husband or work wife that could lay the groundwork for taking their work spouse relationship to the next level. Your presence at your spouse or significant other's office Christmas party could keep their work spouse relationship from turning into a workplace affair …If you suspect your spouse or significant other of being romantically involved with someone at work, make sure you accompany the suspected cheater to the annual Christmas party at his or her job.

Since company Christmas parties have a way of exposing workplace affairs, this is the best way to find out if what you suspect is true. Attend the festivities with the suspected cheater and you're sure to find out.Observing the suspected cheater interact with his or her opposite sex co-workers in a social setting like the office Christmas party will either confirm your suspicions, or set your mind at ease. If he or she is romantically involved with someone they work with, their behavior and body language around each other will give them away, even in little ways. But knowing what to look for is the key.If you want to receive a free tip sheet about what to look for, you can e-mail mailto:mitchellreports@bellsouth.net with "What to Look For – b1" in the subject line. That'll ensure you enjoy yourself at the party.

Next we go from infidelity to sexual harassment.

Here's some advice from Gayla Crain, founding shareholder of law firm Spencer Crain Cubbage Healy & McNamara: It is not uncommon for some employees to forget their office behavior standards at company holiday parties. In a social setting, an employee may feel more at ease in pursuing another employee in a personal, romantic manner. Making matters worse is that, as a 2006 survey of HR professionals by the Society for Human Resource Management showed, an estimated 70% of respondents said that drinking is accepted at their organizations' holiday parties. Employers receiving any complaints of inappropriate behavior at the holiday party should take such complaints seriously and should take prompt, effective steps to address the complaint.

This is particularly true if someone complains during the party or if a witness reports an inappropriate incident during the party.

The bottom line is that an effective complaint procedure, if properly drafted and implemented, can be extremely valuable in defending against sex harassment charges – no matter what happens at the office party.”

At the risk of making it seem as though I'm trivializing these issues – and let me say that they are serious – I'll point out the fact that this advice is issued in press releases aimed at raising the profile of the experts.

There's an element of self-interest here. So, all that to say that if you're lucky enough to get a company holiday party this year, heed some timeless advice: don't drink too much, don't try to make out with anybody, and don't drive drunk.